Domestic violence doesn’t discriminate; People discriminate! 

img_2715Domestic violence and abuse is more common than most people think.

It doesn’t discriminate; it can happen to anyone regardless of gender, social standing, social economic background, race or religion.

Support groups have grown in the last couple of years, new laws and policies have been put in place and education programs for men have been introduced.

All these things are wonderful and a step in the right direction… but they are mainly for ‘violence against women’.

Domestic violence and abuse affects all type of relationships –

  • Heterosexual relationships – either gender violent towards their partner
  • Gay/lesbian relationships
  • Family violence direct/in-direct against children
  • Elderly and Disability abuse by caregiver or family member
  • Bullying in school yard or office including cyber bullying
  • Stalking either physically or via social media

Domestic violence isn’t just about physical abuse it includes verbal or nonverbal abuse (psychological abuse, mental abuse, emotional abuse), sexual abuse and economic abuse or financial abuse.

A person with a beautiful heart and soul is to be cherished, not abused – Amanda Ray

May is ‘Domestic & Family Violence Prevention month’ and it’s important that we recognise all forms of abuse not just on ‘violence against women’…. and look at the effects and results of domestic abuse, so that we can better help survivors.

These effects can be long-lasting and if the survivor doesn’t rebuild their confidence then there is a high probability that they will attract another abusive relationship.

In the case of children or teens that have grown up with domestic violence in the home, some and certainly not all, are more likely to be bullies at school, suffer from depression, use drugs or become abusers in their own relationships later in life.

Counselling helps with the physiology and emotional well-being of survivors which is needed in the first couple of months. But after that, survivors need to get on with life and look for work or find a place to live.

Leaving the relationship is the first step in a long process of rebuilding your life. It can take months or years for a survivor to regain their confidence and learn to trust again.

Learning early to regain your confidence and self-esteem, will mean you can get back into enjoying and living your life quicker.

As a person, who spent 10 years in an abusive relationship and didn’t do the work on building my confidence after I left, it’s not surprising that I attracted another abusive relationship.

It took me, nearly 12 years to finally understand that they only way I was going to start enjoying life was to rebuild my confidence and self-esteem.

I did it the hard way, by myself… I strongly recommend that you learn from my mistake and seek professional assistance.